Sensual Arts For Beginners
WRITTEN BY BENDY GIRL
READ TIME: 4 min. 15 sec.
One thing living teaches us, is that life is MESSY! In the processing of figuring out how to be here each of us have the choice to measure up, find a work around, or we can sleep right through it. The birth of a new life comes with no guarantees and zero promises. The life we make for ourselves in the process of this Earth walk is what living is all about. This is why the power of pleasure is valuable! To learn more about why pleasure is a necessary element for living well checkout this article from NYTimes.
How hard do you fight for your dreams, how high do you set your bar and just how far do you push yourself to grab all those I wish/s that really do mean everything to you?
I am a huge David Goggins fan and his analogy of the end of life and our final recognizing, has stuck with me since reading his book Can’t Hurt Me. What if at the end of our life we had to account for not living up to the full human potential intended for us (you know - the things we should have done) rather than those bad deeds done? This indeed would throw life perception on its head. Now don’t get me wrong I am not a God the father believer by any means - but the metaphor is raw and shouldn’t be ignored.
We have one life and one opportunity to make ourselves, our dreams and our goals our top priority. No one really cares if you don’t get it right… in the end it’s all you. The good the bad and the ugly! When it comes right down to it, spending time on anything but bettering ourselves, improving our lives and deepening our human experience, is a true waste of valuable time.
As a yoga studio owner I felt intense frustration on a regular basis. Health always seemed just out of reach. The tight hamstrings turned into bad backs, regular migraines, sleepless nights and emotional battlefields. Sickness was chronic, mobile and a mainstay that most turned to like a glass of fine wine. It was comforting for many to talk about their illness, much like a pain-in the ass grown child that just wouldn’t leave home. The illness became the conversation, the life and the comfort. It became hard to watch and eventually the lack of lasting health and wellbeing became the push that forced me to sell my studios. Health was my life long conundrum that I wished I could unravel.
In 5th grade I gave up recess forever. I was over the bullies, the fights and the nasty little comments. Home was a war ground for me, and I damn sure was not going to accept that for myself at school as well. I escaped to the library and became the librarians best helper. Everyday I could be found shelving books before school, after school, summer/winter break and during every single recess. At a very young age I became the queen of the “work-around.” I developed an intense love for books, and authors were my celebrities. I studied everything I could about my favorite authors. I was always incredibly fascinated as to how they lived their lives. By the age of 10, my biggest dream in life was to be an author. I have realized my dream twice. In my perfect world I would spend much of my time, writing.
When I entered sexwork I felt as if I had found the Holy Grail of intense internal healing. The “ahh-hha” moments were numerous and the revelations were intense. John Lennon > you fucker < “Love” really is the answer!! The amount of healing that can come from therapeutic intimacy is profound. My head and heart were all over it. I felt as if I finally had the tools/information necessary to create a lasting healing impact. I wanted to do more than just “fuck-around.” I wanted to blow minds open and to mend broken hearts. I wanted to be a part of a healing solution that could unravel the true ramifications of the loss of love, intimacy, passion and relationship.
My love for healing and my newly found tools from sexwork seemed to be the perfect subjects of my 1st book. I wanted to supply my clients with real tools that could be taken home to possibly make love better. A good teacher just shines a light of knowledge and wisdom. No one can teach you anything. A teacher can only crack open your mind, so you see things in a different light. When the window of knowledge opens in one’s mind, a new perspective enters as a breath of fresh air rushing in. The word Guru is defined as one who lends the light. Once the light is passed to you, it is up to you to use the light to find your way.
My book Sensual Arts for Beginners was written as gift to my clients. It offers you an opportunity to take my skills home to deepen the connection with your loved one. My book can be found on Amazon and zero references to sex work or me as BG, it is written under my relationship coach title: Loveologist. It is an introduction to tantra and the theory behind maintaining loving relationships. Whether you are seeking a way to add more love into your relationship, or if you are looking to prepare yourself for the ultimate relationship of your dreams, this book is written for you. My intention was to stretch my lessons beyond my mat and give you an opportunity to take them home.
My book is a love letter to all my clients whom I have had the joy of spending time with, and those I look forward to. Thank you for the stories, the conversations, the open hearts, the precious time and the intense joy we have shared together. I hope you enjoy it and then share it with someone you love.
Forever and Always XO,
BendyGirl
Loveologist
Get the book HERE
